feat(apple): collect transfers held for this device

Adds the opt-in foreground check and an explicit Check now, the waiting-to-
be-delivered list on the sender side, and honest reporting when a send could
not be delivered: a closed app is a delay, not a success nobody received.

The setting is off by default and its footer states that checking reveals
app-open times to remembered devices, since that is the reason it is a
setting at all.

Records in the design doc that this shipped as one global toggle rather than
the per-contact opt-in originally specified.

.claude/settings.local.json

@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+{
+  "permissions": {
+    "allow": [
+      "Bash(swift test *)"
+    ]
+  }
+}